Funny Santa Banta Jokes
Santa banta jokes in hindi
Santa banta se: MBA ka matlab kya hota hai?
Banta santa se: nahi pata.
Santa banta se: Are aaj kal har jagah MBA ki dhoom
machi hai.
banta: bata phir.
Santa banta se: MBA ka matlab "Mai Bhi Anna"
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Doctor: Aab tabiyat kaisi hai?
Santa: Pehle se zyada kharab hai.
…
Doctor: Dawai kha li thi?
Santa: Nahi, dawai ki sishi to bhari hui thi.
…
Doctor: I mean dawai le li thi?
Santa: Ji aapne di to maine le li thi.
…
Doctor: Bewakoof dawai pee li thi?
Santa: Nahi dawai to laal thi.
…
Doctor: Abe gadhe dawai ko pee liya tha?
Santa: Nahi sir peelia to mujhe tha!!!
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Santa jokes in english
One dog was sitting under the santa car.
Santa: what r u doing under my car. Don' try to
become an engineer.
Santa jokes in hindi
Ek kutta santa ki car ke niche baitha tha.
Santa gusse se, tu meri car ke niche kya kar raha
hai. bada aaya engineer banane
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Fat Santa and Doctor banta Jokes in english
Fat Santa to Doctor banta: sir i wanted to reduce
my weight.
Doctor banta to Fat santa: run 8 km every day and
come back after 300 days.
Fat santa is calling to doctor banta: Sir, i
reduced my weight but i am 24,000km away from my
house.
Fat santa and doctor banta jokes in hindi
Fat santa doctor banta se: mujhe apna weight kam
karna hai.
Doctor banta fat santa se: roz 8 km doddo aur 300
din bad aana
Fat santa call karta hai banta ko: are mera weight
kam ho gaya hai aur mai 24,000km door hu.
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Santa And Professor jokes
Professor:Chemical symbol of Barium?
Sardar: BA
Professor:For sodium?
Sardar: NA
Professor:What will we get if 1 atom of BA
& 2 atoms of NA combined?
Sardar: BANANA
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Santa - My Wife Died Yesterday..
I'm Trying To Cry But Tears Are Not Come Out,
What To Do?
Banta - No Problem.
Just Imagine She Came Back.
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Santa's Army Test
Pappu- 3+5?
Santa- 8
Pappu- 7+3?
Santa- 10
Pappu- 8+8?
Santa- Pata Nahi Sir
Mere Pass Sirf 10 Hi Ungli Hai.
(=AwaD O_0
W!LD T3XT3R
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Santa:Aaj Kisine Mere BAAP Ko Gaali Di.
Patni:Fir?
Santa:Maine Bhi Uske Baap Ko Gaali Di.
Patni:Lekin Wo Kaun Tha?
Santa:Mera BETA..
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Sardar Ki Beti Hoi.
Biwi: Suno Ji Jb Ye Bari Hogi Tou Larke Ise Tung Krn
Ge.
Sardar: Me Ne Is Problem Ka Solution Dhondh Lia He
Hm Iska Nam "BAJI" Rakhn Ge;-)
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Teacher:Bada Ho K Kya Banoga
Santa:Pilot
Tcher:Q
S:Upar Accedent Ka Khatra Nhi Hota
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Santa:Ye TUm Ne PattiAn KYun Bandhi Hui HAin?
Banta: KaL Ek Admi Meri GAri Se Takra GYa Tha,
Santa: Chot To USay I HO Gi, Magr Pattian Tum Ne
Q Bandhi?
Banta: Bas YaAr KAL Us Shakhs Se Achanak MuLaqat
Ho GAi Thi.
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Santa Platfrom K Side Leta Tha
Banta-Kya Kar Rahe Ho?
Santa-Sucite
Banta-To Beach Me Leto
Santa-Dar Lagta He...
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SaNtA TUM Is OFFiCe Ma KUb SE KAM KR RAhE HO ?
BaNtA : JUb SE BoSs NE MuJhE NOkRi SE NIkALnE KI
DHAMkI DI HA ...;->
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Govt announced: Jinke 5 bacche...
Govt announced: Jinke 5 bacche hain, unhe 1 ghar denge.
Santa ke 3 the aur apne Wife se bola: Padosan ke 2 bhi mere hi hain....unko le aao. Laney par Apne 3 kahan gaye?
.
.
.
.
Wife: Jinke the wo le gaye.
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santa: doc last night i had sex with a girl.. but today susu not coming..it has blocked..
.
.
.
.
Doctor aft checking: lofar remove the condom first:-D
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Sabziwala Sabzi Par Pani Chhidak Raha Tha
Kaafi Der ho Gayi to Santa Kantaal Ke bola-
Agar Sabzi ko HOSH Aa Gaya ho to Ek kilo De Do...!!! D
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Q: Why did Santa fall out the window ?
A: He was ironing the curtain
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A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket match.
All were busy writing except our Santaji.
He wrote DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!
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Santa apnyi premika se kheta hai hum tumari yad me ro ro ke tab bhar diye
tum bewafa sanam nhake chal diye
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santa: samindar me dahi dal raha tha
banta:isi liye log humpe joke banate hay. itni lassi tera baap piyega
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Santa got a invitation of party.
Usme likha tha Pink Tie Only
Santa jab party me gaya to logo ne pant shirt bhi pehena tha.
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Santa is checking out of a hotel when suddenly he has to take a shit
real bad. The toilet in his room doesn’t flush so he runs to the lobby
to use the men’s room but none of the stalls are free. He runs back to
his room ,uproots a plant and shits in the pot .Then he puts the plant
back and leaves. A week later he gets a postcard from the hotel that
says” Dear Sir……all is forgiven…..just tell us…….where is it?”
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Santa walks into a bar, sits down and orders a beer. As he sips the beer
he hears a soothing voice say “nice tie”. He looks around and is baffled
to see that there is no one there except him and the bartender at the other
end of the room. A few sips later the voice says “beautiful shirt”
.Santa panics and calls the bartender over and says “I must be losing my
mind, I can hear these voices say nice things but there is no one else
except you and me” , the bartender points to the table and says
“oh it’s the peanuts , they are complimentaryInappropriate things that Santa tells his kid
-Beta why is a cemetery so popular?
Everyone is DYING to get in.
-Beta do you need a hand with that?
Haan papaji
Santa starts clapping.
-After watching his son slip on the slide, Santa says, “Happy journey Beta!!!!”
-Santa’s son asks for 100 bucks.
Santa says “ 50 bucks? What do you need 20 bucks for?”
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Santa’s wife hit him on the head with the frying pan.
Santa: What was that for?
Santa’s Wife: I found a paper in your pocket with the same BASANTI on it.
Santa: I bet on a horse last week and BASANTI was the name of my horse.
Santa’s wife: Oho Sorry
Next day she hit him with the frying pan again.
Santa: now what happened?
Santa’s wife: your horse is on the phone.
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Shadi me Joota chhupai ke time dulhe ki 1sali boli-
Mein to 1100 Lungi
2nd sali- Mein to 2100 Lungi
piche se
Santa bola: 2310 Lelo Usme Bluetooth aur FM bhi he
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Santa- Hey bhagwan promotion karwa dena
51 rupees ka bhog apke chorono me rakh rha hu!!
God- Pagal marwayega kya?
ANNA HAZARE
Dekha raha hai
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Circus mein ladki ne sher ko kiss kiya to
Ring mastar ne kaha Aap mein se koi yeh kar sakta hai,
Santa- Zarur par pehle iss sher ko peeche hatao!
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Santa Cricket Khel Kar Aaya..
Banta: Kitne Run Banaye?
Santa: Century Hone Me 99 Run Baki The Or mai Out Ho Gaya.
Banta: Shit Yaar so close!
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Santa : pehle me apni biwi ko BA karwaunga fir MA fir Phd karwaunga fir badiya si naukri dilwaunga.
Banta : fir acha sa rishta dekh k uski shaadi bhi krwa diyo
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santa apne father k samne cigrate pi raha tha
Logon ne kaha ke aap apne father ke samne cigratte pi rahay ho?
Santa bola : Wo mera father hai, koi petrol pump thodi.
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Interviewer : Imagine, in a closed room, how can you escape if it caught fire?
Santa : Simple, Stop imagining.
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Santa : O Banno Car ki speed itani kyo badha di..?
Biwi : Oji Car ki break fail ho gayi hai, accident ho jaye iske
pehele ghar pahunch jaate hai.
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Banta fell in love with a porno star and married her. He got an
opportunity to watch one of her movie.... the Movie came to an End.
A bit disturbed and annoyed with what he saw, Banta told himself,
"Thank God it was just a movie and not reality."
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santa banta were fighting after exam.
Sir: Y r u fighting?
santa : This fool left the answer sheet blank,
Sir: So what?
santa: Even i did the same thing, now teacher
will think that we both copied.
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Santa traveling 1st time in plane going to BOMBAY,
while landing, he shouted : "BOMBAY-BOMBAY",
air hostess : " B-silent please ",
santa said : " OMBAY - OMBAY.....!!!!!!!! "
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Santa dabang dekh ker aaya,
School mei…
Sir: santa tumhare sare ans. galat hn,
marks de to kahan?
Santa: Kamal karte hai sirji, marks hi to mang rahe hai
,chup chap de do warna thappad mar k b le sakte hai.
Sir: Badtamiz
kya bak rha hai?
Santa: Badtamiz se yaad aya sir, apke papa kaise hai?
Sir: nikal ja class se!
Santa: Chup chap se marks de do sir, warna ans sheet me
itne chhed karunga, ki confuse ho jaoge ki marks kaha
de aur zero kahan!!
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Santa: Me bada hokar Air Force me jaunga.
Mom: Mujhe kaise pata chalega k ye mere bete ka plane h?
Santa:Me guzarte waqt ghar pe BOMB phek dunga :p
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Santa ne challenge kiya:
Ke wo kutubminar ko sir pe rkh k emumbai le jayega.
Saare News Wale pahunch gaye:
Tab Bola- Bas koi utha ke sir pe rakh de!
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Lady Beggar: A bhaiya 1 rupya dede 3 din se bhuki hu.
Santa: 3 din se bhuki h to 1 rupye ka kya karegi?
Funny Santa Banta Jokes
